


take up my heart

by SuOliveira



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Also there’s no Amber/Melissa, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode Related, Fluff and Angst, Minor Steve McGarrett/Catherine Rollins, Sort Of, after Kono and Adam's wedding, but I promise it's very much mcdanno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-01-31 15:03:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21448150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuOliveira/pseuds/SuOliveira
Summary: Danny had a plan.After Kono’s wedding, when there were no chance of any thunder being stolen and no brides being infuriated, they were going to talk. They were going to actually talk and define the relationship and figure out what they were and where were things going.That was until Catherine showed up.
Relationships: Steve McGarrett/Danny "Danno" Williams
Comments: 17
Kudos: 242





	take up my heart

**Author's Note:**

> I heard a song and this story just wrote itself in my head and it wouldn't let me go until I finished it. 
> 
> Also, for those of you following Mohai, I'm still working on it. It's just that next chapter is smut and I haven't written sexy times in such a long time and I'm feeling bit self conscious, so it's taking a bit of time. But it's coming, I promise.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!
> 
> (story is not beta'd and I just wrote it all in one sitting so there might be a few mistakes, and I very deeply apologize in advance for all of them.)

It had been only a couple of months since Steve and Danny had stopped dancing around this thing of theirs. The thing that had been getting slowly overwhelming until they couldn’t help it anymore and fell into each other. 

Danny wasn’t really one to jump into bed with someone on the first night, but then again, Steve often made him break all his rules. On the other hand, when you really thought about it, it was almost 6 years in the making and there’s only so much a guy can take. 

So jump into bed they had. Quite often, actually. Bed, couch, recliner chair, lanai chairs, the dining room table in one memorable occasion. It wasn’t just sex, though. There were the nights when they would just sit together on the couch, eating pizza and screaming to referees on the screen. Or cuddling together on the recliner with a stupid movie that Danny very much did not fall asleep in the middle of, thank you very much. There were the quiet mornings with their legs tangled together in bed and lazy kisses being exchanged when the sun was barely up. 

So, Danny had a plan. After Kono’s wedding, when there were no chance of any thunder being stolen and no brides being infuriated, they were going to talk. They were going to actually talk and define the relationship and figure out what they were and where were things going. 

That was until Catherine showed up. Until she planted herself in Steve’s house and Danny couldn’t help but feeling like she was standing in his place. But he didn’t quite know if there was anything he could do about it. Because Steve was less than forthcoming with answers for the questions Danny had. 

Danny felt off kilter the whole rest of the day. He was a professional, of course. So he handled the case, he handled another instance of “the world is falling apart and we must stop it” and he said nothing. Well, as much as he could. He didn’t ask Steve what that meant for them, he didn’t ask if he was going to take Catherine back. He didn’t do all the things he wanted to do, even though it was breaking his heart slowly. 

When all was over and done with, it hurt to see Steve bringing Catherine to the wedding. It hurt to see her in his arms and watch as everyone just thought that was just what was expected. 

The thing is, Kono knew. After the ceremony, as the bride and groom walked around speaking to their guests, she caught his eye. Danny and Steve had never come right out and told anyone about… whatever they were, but Danny should have known Kono had figured it out. She smiled at him and, even though that was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, he could see a hint of sadness in her expression. For him. 

So Danny shook his head and winked at her, giving Kono what he hoped was his best blinding smile as he stood up to hug her tightly. 

“Congratulations, babe,” he whispered against her ear. “You look beautiful and I’m so happy for you.”

“Thanks, brah,” she kissed his cheek before pulling back and staring right into his eyes. “Danny…”

“Nope,” he shook his head again, holding her face between both of his hands before leaning forward and brushing a kiss on her forehead. “Today is your day. Today is a happy day. Go, go be with your husband.”

Kono rolled his eyes at him, but did what he said. She grabbed his hand and squeezes it once, grinning brightly as she turned back around to Adam. 

Danny focused on Grace for the rest of the afternoon, avoiding Steve and Catherine like the plague and hoping he was just doing enough to keep his sweet little girl from figuring out what was happening. He didn’t miss the kiss, though. He couldn’t have, since Steve was kissing her right in the middle of the dance floor and in front of everyone else.

After Rachel came to pick up Grace, though, Danny didn’t have another excuse and, since he refused to leave before the bride and groom did, he found himself walking to the beach and leaving the dance floor behind. 

Danny went as close to shore as he could without actually getting close to the water before took off his shoes and sat down on top of them. Not the most comfortable, but when he finally managed to leave at least he wouldn’t have sand on his ass. He would take his dignity wherever he could have it. 

He wasn’t quite sure how long he was sitting there until he heard the telltale signs of someone coming up behind him; the muffled sound of footsteps on the sand, the whispers of clothes rustling. Danny didn’t turn around and after a few seconds, he saw from the corner of his eye as someone sat down next to him. He didn’t need to look to know that it was Steve and he sighed. 

“Okay, guess it’s my time to go,” he started to get up, before he was interrupted by a hand on his arm.

“Danno, please -”

“Don’t,” Danny said, sitting back down despite himself. “Don’t call me that. Not now.”

“I’m sorry.” Steve winced slightly, taking his hand back. 

“You know, I -” Danny stopped himself, shaking his head and rubbing his face forcefully. “No, never mind.”

“No, don’t do that,” Steve turned to face him. “You - please talk to me, Danny.”

Danny took a deep breath, closing his eyes and throwing his head back as he thought about it. He could. He could talk to Steve. He could tell Steve everything he was thinking and he was feeling, but chances were that would just ruin everything even more. Could he risk it? At this point they could probably salvage it. Danny could get over it. He could learn to live with keeping his feelings to himself and seeing Steve and Catherine every day. He had done it before, after all. But the thing was, Steve asked. Steve asked for it. So Danny felt justified in letting it all out. 

“I never left you, Steve,” Danny started, and he could hear the quiet gasp from Steve. “I never left you. I would never leave you. I had the chance to leave, so many times I thought maybe now it’s the time I gotta go, but I never did. I always chose you. I’ve always chosen you. I’ll probably always choose you, even when you break my heart.”

Danny stopped to take another deep breath, knowing that at some point soon his voice was going to break and he would not be able to blink back the tears anymore, but forced himself to keep going. 

“She left you. So many times, Steve. Whenever something better comes along, she leaves you. And I hate her for it. Because you deserve more people choosing you. You deserve everyone choosing you and it kills me that she doesn’t, but every time she comes back, you still pick her. So I can’t do this anymore. You choose her, fine, but this is it, okay? I’m sorry, babe, but this has to be it for me. I’ll be your friend, I’ll be your partner, I’ll always be here for you. But I can do this, us, anymore.”

Danny finished and dropped his head between his legs. By the end of it, his voice was shaky and he could barely see the ocean in front of him with his eyes so full of unshed tears. 

“I know,” came the quiet reply, and Danny stopped breathing for a second. “I know all of that, and I just -” Steve reached for him again, barely brushing his fingers against Danny’s arm. “If I talk now, do you promise to listen to me, Danny? All of it, please. Listen to me before you make any decisions or walk out or anything. Please?”

“I’m listening.”

“Okay. Thank you,” Steve sighed heavily. “I know that she leaves. And she’s probably gonna leave again. And I know that you always choose me. And you know what, that amazes me all the time, Danny. Because I don’t deserve that. I really don’t. But you still do. And I’m selfish and I want you to keep doing it, and I want you to stay in my life and I want you. I just want you.”

“What happened today…” Steve continued, shaking his head at himself. “What happened today was me being stupid. And insecure. And, and unable to handle feelings, like you so often accuse me of. I guess you were right. I just thought - I thought that I dedicated so many years of my life to this thing with Catherine that I - I felt like I owed it to the guy I was, and to her, to keep going with it. To - I don’t know. Try again, I guess? But that was probably the stupidest thing I have ever thought of.”

“You - you make me so happy, Danny. These last few months with you have been - I don’t even have - I’ve never really been happy like this. And comfortable. And… people always leave me, you know? And I think I just… didn’t think I really deserved to be happy. And I just didn’t know how to deal with all of it. I didn’t know how to - I didn’t -”

Danny waited for Steve to continue, rubbing his face again as he turned to face his partner as well. Steve’s face was conflicted, and sad. And his eyes held so much confusion that it broke Danny’s heart a little.

“You what, babe?” Danny asked.

“I hurt you. I never wanted to. All I wanted to do was make you as happy as you make me. I didn’t know how to do that. I didn’t know how to let myself be happy either and I just - Catherine is gone, Danny. Kissing her felt - it felt bad. And wrong. And even if you don’t forgive me, even if this is the end of us, I never want to do it again. Because, because I just. It wasn’t you. And it wasn’t right. And I knew it wasn’t going to be. Anyone other than you would never feel right. But I made a mistake and I hurt the one person I love most in the world. But I have to tell you. I’m never choosing anyone over you. Ever, Danny. Not ever.”

“Danno loves you too,” Danny whispered.

Steve startled as he stared at Danny, a small smile spreading across his face as the words sunk in.

“You mean it?”

“I do. I still want to punch you. About as much as I want to kiss you.”

“Can I pick? I pick the kiss, please. I’ll take the punch too, cause I deserve it, but yeah, the kiss please.”

“Shut up.”

Danny rolled his eyes and leaned forward, brushing his lips against Steve’s gently, sighing quietly as he pulled back.

“I don’t even know how I can stand it, you are such an emotionally stunted Neanderthal,” Danny said, reaching to softly tap his knuckles against Steve’s cheek. “But you’re my emotionally stunted Neanderthal.”

Reaching once more, Danny gripped Steve’s chin, forcing his partner’s face right in front of his own. “But hey, listen to me. Are you listening?”

Danny waited for Steve’s nod before he looked at him very seriously. “I don’t share. If you’re mine, you’re only mine. Got it?”

“Yeah, Danno,” Steve nodded again. “Don’t want nobody else, I promise.”

Danny smiled at him, bringing Steve’s face even closer and kissing him again. The kiss was deeper this time, Danny taking Steve’s lips between his teeth and pulling for a second before releasing him.

“Take me home?”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> The song responsible for all of this:
> 
> And I'm not normally the jealous, jealous type  
But I imagined it'd be you and me tonight  
And I bet Julie's really smart  
Oh you keep saying she's so cool  
But if you pick her over me you're just a fool
> 
> Julie - Emily Kinney
> 
> (please take a second to let me know what you think?)


End file.
